For a few years my sleeping hadn't been great. I always had the feeling that I was not getting enough or that the quality was not very good. About 15 months ago, I started waking up at two, two thirty or three a.m., and I couldn't get back to sleep. There was nothing happening in my life that I thought might be connected to my insomnia, so I thought it might have been physical — a thyroid problem or something. I had some tests done and they were all negative. I had acupuncture twice a week for a few weeks: that didn't change anything.
     Then it got really bad. I felt so sleep-deprived for a few weeks: I felt exhausted, completely exhausted...physically and mentally. I felt joyless, and found it hard to work, hard to concentrate, to respond to situations, and to deal with people.
     I started Osho Dynamic in August 2001, just in the mood of a general experiment. I didn't connect these two things — my insomnia, and Osho Dynamic as a possible cure — at all.
     One morning before the meditation the leader chose a quote to play to us before the meditation began; it was about totality. That triggered something in me. In it Osho said that during the jumping [the third step] — almost my most difficult thing — to let the "Hoo" be like a hammering inside to waken the energies...something like that. Hearing that I went so totally into it, as never before!
     In the past I had avoided Osho Dynamic because it took energy. But this time it gave me so much energy.
     Then I noticed, after about three times of doing it, that I slept so well. At first I would wake at three in the morning but I would get up and felt full of energy. Before, when I woke at three, I was tired and would try to go back to sleep. But since starting Osho Dynamic I found I had a lot of energy all day and also in the evenings.
     I continued it for three weeks, pretty much regularly. Then at some point I began to sleep longer, waking at five a.m. which is my normal time. And that is still the case now, six months later.
     I can't tell you how amazed I was! I still don't know why the insomnia was there, but maybe just through my releasing energy or...I don't know. It's as if something in me was disturbed, wanted to be lived and expressed — and I think in the night these things come up in the unconscious.
     As I said, in the past Osho Dynamic made me tired...perhaps because I was efforting too much, not understanding the difference between totality and effort. For the German mind totality means as much effort as possible. I found a way to be relaxed throughout — in the breathing and in the jumping — and then I was no longer tired, and that of course made me enjoy it more!

     I found a quote which really helped me understand this. In it Osho says: "If you try to participate totally it will not be total: no effort can ever be total. No technique can ever be total because you will be manipulating. You will be separate from it; you will be trying to be total. How can you try to be total?
     "You can relax; only then does totality come into being. You are in a let-go; then you are total." ( Yoga: The Alpha and the Omega ) To read what Osho has to say about Insomnia and Osho Dynamic ...A Cure for Insomnia

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